I have had this problem of ‘double vision’ ever since I was 16 or 17. And it has only been deteriorating, prominently so in the last one year. Believe me, it is not so ‘livable with’ as it sounds. People get offended at me not smiling back at them. Sometimes it becomes almost impossible to make out what is a streetlight from a headlight when I drive in the nights. Rest assured, I have stopped driving in the nights and am waiting for Sheryl to get her Driving License to make our nocturnal outdoors possible.
Keratoconus is a condition where in the Cornea of the eye is bent to a conical form, normally which would be nice and round. The best part is that eventually the cornea bends to such an extent that it ruptures, taking with it the eyesight of the person. Scary enough, but my consolation has been in people like Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles who lived with blindness, and made it big. Keratoconus was not detected until in the last 20 years and they say it is only seen in my Generation who have it world over. (Even as I write, my spell check fails to recognize the term). And for the same reason, All my visits to the Ophthalmologist were futile. The Doctors were literally laughing at me and stumped alike when I meticulously described my distorted vision to them. Only in 2009 just after my marriage we successfully diagnosed it as Keratoconus in a local Hospital in Bangalore. Ironically, I was overjoyed and feeling stupidly victorious after knowing that the condition was finally acknowledged by the Ophthalmologist community.
Since this is a progressive disease, the treatment has to be quick and fast before any further damage is done. And the reports aren’t that consoling either. I have to have my surgery this year or early next.
I am 28 now. It won’t be long until I am fully blind. (no joke)
Let’s see. I have always believed in Miracles. Always. Every time there was a proclamation at a healing service I would expectantly check each eye to see if I was the one (My left eye suffers more than the right). Whilst I believe that Jesus can heal me if He wants to, I also want to know if it in His PLAN to heal me. St Paul had to live with his thorn, remember? I am not decided yet if I want to do that surgery which again has no promise of 100% success.
Have you heard the song ‘When a Blind Man cries’ by Deep Purple – is it really that tragic?